You want to hear something wild? I wasn’t formally diagnosed with ADHD until recently, but before even seeing a psychiatrist, I was certain I had it. Why? TikTok. 

I know. I know. I’m a 30-something mom. I’m not even supposed to be on TikTok, right?! My sisters-in-law who are younger and cooler than me convinced me that TikTok is the digital space to be. 

Once I got through the initial phase of constant cute cat clips, the algorithm began to work its magic, and it started showing me users with diagnosed ADHD. I don’t know how or why this happened, but I was pulled in by how similar their situations were with my own.

They would list common signs, like significant procrastination, need for novelty, and hyperfocus. And they’d talk about things that are particularly hard for them because they live with ADHD (hello, keeping up with chores). They described this debilitating space between wanting so badly to do things and a strong impulse to avoid everything.

I had never considered I could have ADHD until I started seeing these TikTokers talking about their personal experiences. Video after video would focus on the topic of ADHD, and every single one felt relevant to me. 

You know how Oprah would talk about “aha moments”? This was my aha moment. Wow, I thought. It turns out I’m not crazy, stupid, lazy, or any other number of negative labels I had attributed to myself. 

Finally, there was a reason for a lot of my behaviors that I grew up thinking were bad personality traits. At long last, there was an explanation for my hypervigilance and exhaustion, anxiety and depression. I had been white knuckling my way through ADHD for decades. 

While I still haven’t been able to get treatment via medication (Did you know ADHD meds aren’t safe while breastfeeding? Fun times.), I now have support and guidance from my therapist and psychiatrist about how to live with ADHD. Last year, I even took a class taught by two licensed clinical social workers on functioning with ADHD as an adult. 

I was given tools and tips to help make daily life a bit easier. More importantly, I was given a sense of community, of validation. It felt amazing to be in a room with people like me, who have the same struggles when it comes to work, relationships, household responsibilities, sleep—life. I felt seen and understood. 

The people I found through TikTok and the ones I found through the ADHD class both reinforced the importance of having a community of people who understand what you’re going through. Whether that community is online or in person, it really helps to know other people are struggling with some of the same issues. And you can get through those struggles—together.

Here are a handful of folks in the ADHD TikTok community I have to thank for helping me: 

@howtoadhd

@nestingyourlife

@drlauragouge

@kayleenkellyorganize

@clairebowmanofficial

Photo by cottonbro studio from Pexels.